I broke my saw.




 Fictitious And Completely True
 Observations Regarding The Real World

Grouchogandhi
A Punch-Drunk Filter of FACTs

Fictitious and Completely True State Legislature Votes

— Friday, September 28, 2007 —
  FACT: 0 eigenstates 



Ding ding!






Don't Tase Me, Bro

— Tuesday, September 18, 2007 —
  FACT: 0 eigenstates 

Perfect for your next Fictitious And Completely True freak-out...

Don't Tase Me, Bro shirt


OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW



Basically 4 security people who Blackwater would never hire.






Cadbury 'Gorilla' Marketing

— Saturday, September 01, 2007 —
  FACT: 3 eigenstates 

I have to admit, I'm absolutely going ape over this Cadbury Chocolates masterful feat of memetic engineering and guerrilla (gorilla) marketing.

My suspicion is the demographics of this ad span both sexes from teens to elder baby boomers. The Miami Vice drums moment beat is eternal.

I've seen the ad. I know who it's for. That's more than most advertisiers can brag.

Click the picture below to soak it up. Then come back and read the transcript underneath.






Here's the pitch:


Video Transcript

We open on purple recording studio wall.
A title appears: A Glass and a Half Full Production.
We start listening to the first sounds of
'In The Air Tonight' by Phil Collins.

The camera slowly pans down as we hear the
keyboard's atmospheric intro. When we start
listening to the first lyrics we spot a hairy
thing in the edge of the frame. As the camera keeps
panning, the mysterious figure gets revealed.

We realize that in front of us is a gorilla.
It looks calmly to camera. Phil continues singing:
'I can feel it coming in the air tonight.'

The massive Gorilla stares at us - concentrated.
We are almost sure that he knows we are filming him,
but his eyes look through and beyond the lens.
'I've been waiting for this moment for all of my life.'

The gorilla focuses back on the camera.
All we see is neck and head . And hair.

The camera gently zooms out revealing the
Gorilla's surroundings. We see more of the studio.
And we discover a series of metallic things around him.

We realize that the Gorilla is sitting in front of a
massive drum kit. One of those Eighties big kits with
loads of things to hit. Loads of tom-toms, hi-hats,
double bass drum, etc.

We know that the best drum solo in the whole history of
rock - ever - is coming. The Gorilla knows it too.

The Gorilla hits the drums with passion and vigour.
Elegance meets power. He's phenomenal on the drums -
feeling every beat.

The camera leaves the ape and his drum kit in the studio.

The screen fades to purple. We see a Cadbury Dairy Milk bar
of chocolate appear above the words
'A Glass and a half full of Joy'


Brilliant. Check out The Independent's coverage from this past May.



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   FACT:






Replicant (M) Des: LEONNEXUS-6 N6MAC41717
Incept Date: 10 APRIL, 2017Func: Combat/Loader (Nuc. Fiss)
Phys: LEV. AMental: LEV. C

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